Wednesday, July 23, 2008

Dark Remains (2005)

me every morning before coffee

Directed by: Brian Avenet-Bradley
Format: DVD
DVD Features: commentary, trailer, behind the scenes, deleted scenes, prison featurette
Starring: Cheri Christian, Greg Thompson, Scott Hodges, Jeff Evans, Patrick G. Keenan
trailer

(Thanks go to our reader Carrie for suggesting this review!)

The loss of a child is an event that parents deal with in different ways. Although sadness is a natural response, grief can manifest itself in many forms. Some people feel anger. Some blame themselves. Some turn to a higher power. If the parents in question happen to be in a movie though, two methods of coping are almost guaranteed to surface. One of them is watching a lot of home movies (do people still make those?) and the other seems to be moving.

When the daughter of Julie and Allen Pyke is murdered, the couple decides to rent a cabin in the hills. Mr. Pyke hopes that the relocation will provide a welcome escape and a place for his wife to recover. Julie makes her living as a professional photographer, but lost interest in her camera after the incident. With a little prodding, Allen convinces her to take a look around and try a few snapshots of the area. When she stumbles upon an abandoned prison, something strange develops. Friends of the Pykes come to visit and leave in a hurry. The cabin's hillbilly caretaker tips the couple off about the prior occupants and their grim fate. When Mr. Pyke does some digging at the town library, he discovers a string of strange deaths. It's looking more and more like the couple should vacate the premisis, but Julie has decided to stay.

Dark Remains looks very much like a low-budget movie shot with a high-budget camera. The colors are crisp and vibrant. The shots are steady and focused. While not particularly creative as far as angles and technique go, the cinematography is solid and doesn't suffer from an overdone arthaus effort (like Fay Grim). I can respect that. I can also respect a special-effects guy who's handy with the latex, spirit glue and red corn syrup. His skills are more readily apparent in the special features than in the actual film (which, perhaps, is the true test). Thank goodness the filmmakers went the old-fashioned way when it came to makeup, because if this movie had any cheap CGI, I don't think I could have sat all the way through it.

Now that the few redeeming aspects of Dark Remains have been identified, I can set to work tearing this thing apart (sorry Carrie). Where do I begin? Ah yes, the - "acting". Julie Pyke, greiving mother, is played by Cheri Christian. She seems terribly familiar to me and I thought I may have seen her as Will's love interest in Good Will Hunting. Turns out that character was played by Minnie Driver (both have that powerful jawline and chipmunk cheeks). Her character suffers from a lack of committment at best. Every time Julie announces that she refuses to do something or is determined to do another, it takes mere seconds for her to change her mind. There's no serious emotion expressed by this woman, aside from an exceptionally brief and barely tearful breakdown. As it turns out, Christian shares a cast listing in several other movies with Greg Thompson, who plays Julie's husband, Allen. Thompson his hardly a better actor. His character is more of a father than a husband, constantly following Julie around and demanding to know what she's doing. He's annoying and also boring. The only actor in this movie who is reasonably watchable is Scott Hodges. He does his best with the script as the backwoods caretaker Jim. In fact, I'm not so sure that the man isn't a creepy hillbilly in reality. I don't even want to go into the few supporting actors that remain. Maybe I should take it easy on the actors though. Maybe they aren't really to blame for the terrible characters. There is, after all, the horrible script to consider.

After watching Dark Remains, I'm left with a series of questions. 1.) How does Allen find his wife at the prison, in the dark, when he's never been there before? 2.) Shouldn't it be the county's duty to chain the doors of the abandoned prison closed, not Mr. Pyke's? 3.)How does Julie find her way back into the prison without unlocking any chains? 4.)Why does the sherrif pop in for a visit, at night, only to harrass the residents, "you didn't kill your daughter, did you? I had to ask." 5.) Why does the movie otherwise completely neglect the subject of an investigation into their child's death? That could have made a better film than this did. 6.) After the prior resident shot himself, why did the cops leave the gun laying around for the next guy to find? 7.) In a horror movie, why does the actual discovery of a body happen off-screen?! 8.) What's the deal with the coffee/tea situation?

What's the scare factor in Dark Remains? Nearly nil. Admittedly, a couple of brief shots made me jump. The problem is that the few methods the filmmaker uses to try to scare the audience are the same three over and over again. One of them is to show a character in a close shot, show that person move, and have something creepy appear in the vacated spot. Another is to use reflections to show the aparitions and the third is a series of doors that move on their own.

The dialogue is so horrible in this movie, that it would almost be preferable to mute the damn thing and play some music instead. Wait, "almost"? I mean, "definitely". If I knew a good camera man and a buddy with a cabin I could borrow, even I could have done a better job than Brian Avenet-Bradley did. I guess that's what happens when the same guy writes, edits and directs the same movie. Thank god he didn't star in it. The producer/cinematographer? - I think she's his wife. Don't waste your time with Dark Remains. Even the trailer sucks. Sadly, it's still not the worst movie I've sever seen, which goes to show that I really will watch anything.

Overall Rating: 2 stars
Hottie Rating: 0 stars

Alternate Recommendation: Shutter
Official Site
IMDB Page
The Video Graveyard review

Tuesday, July 15, 2008

Update: Gummi Awards

Hi everyone! I want to thank all of you who have participated so far in The Gummi Awards. Soon, I'll be closing down some categories, in order to prepare the winning votes. (notice that the Best Dialogue category will close at the end of the week.) It is very important that, when you make your nominations, you include your email address! Otherwise, how will I contact you if you win the prize?? Someone just made an excellent nomination to the Most Overrated Leading Actor category, but didn't send their contact info. Once again, I won't publish your information, only your nomination. I don't sell email addresses or anything shifty like that, so you're safe with GP.

Stay tuned for my votes for the winners of The Gummi Awards!

Saturday, July 05, 2008

Hancock (2008)

look at those arms!

Directed by: Peter Berg
Format: Theater
Starring: Will Smith, Charlize Theron, Jason Bateman, Jae Head
Trailer

Ah, superhero movies. America just doesn't seem to get tired of them. Batman, Superman, Spiderman and Xmen have all jumped the pages of comic books onto the silver screen. Even lesser known characters have sprung forth to have their own feature films; Ironman, The Flash, The Shadow, Electra, Jay & Silent Bob...the list goes on. One of the most surprising developments I've seen in this vein has been The Mask. Originally, yes, it was a comic book. Then, of course, it was a string of films. Oddly, after the films came a children's cartoon. What I find strange about that series of events is that, in its original comic form, the story was so violent, so gruesome and gory, that buyers had to be 18 or older to get their hands on it. That's a far cry from Saturday morning television programming. What peaked my interest in Will Smith's latest feature, Hancock, was that this superhero seemed different. Instead of the latex costume and cape, Hancock appeared as a drunken, unshaven mess, fighting crime in sort of a half-assed fashion. It was encouraging.

Immortal, impervious, inebriated Hancock sails to the rescue during the opening scene of the movie. He's got a bottle of whiskey in one hand, having just woken from a park bench and flies gracelessly toward a police pursuit in progress. He saves the day from a truckload of machine gun wielding gangsters, but not without causing millions of dollars in property damage and leaving the vehicle skewered atop a high rise. Rather than applauding Hancock's latest escapade, the city sees him as a menace. When he saves PR man Ray Embrey, he causes a massive train wreck. But, while the witnessing citizens gather around to call him an asshole (his least favorite insult), Embrey stands up and defends his rescuer. That's when he gets the idea that Hancock could use a little polish.

As mentioned earlier, I was excited to see a new type of hero; one without the goody-two-shoes attitude and shiny uniform. But, as the trailers will show, Hancock cleans up his act. He learns how to land softly and say, "good job" to the police force. Even though he struggles with politeness and opening up in anger management therapy, he manages the transformation to respectable do-gooder. I would have enjoyed him more as a misfit. Hancock says to Ray and his wife Mary (Theron) over dinner, that he knows nothing about his past. That aspect of the man is barely touched on in the beginning, yet it becomes a major focal point halfway though the plot. The way the movie arrives at that stage is somewhat sloppy and ill conceived. The person who's the key to his past, one which he didn't seem to care about until then, is awfully convenient. It seems as if the writers were stuck mid-script and pulled up the nearest character as an answer. Even the follow through with that thread is sloppy. After pausing to work out the logistics, none of it really fits together.

Sadly, even the wonderful cast isn't enough to save Hancock's pathetic plot line. Will Smith is just as entertaining as ever, but a weak script and lackluster dialogue doesn't give the superstar much to work with. It is nice to see Smith, after many serious roles, to return to something with a little humor. However, I fear that Hancock will go down under his list of not-so-fantastic roles. Theron is beautiful and does her part to the best of her ability. But, I haven't seen her top Monster yet, and this movie certainly wasn't even close. Jason Bateman is an admirable character, a PR man with a conscience is hard to find. Bateman fit the bill nicely. He's convincing, mildly annoying and well cast. There aren't many other characters in the film worth mentioning. Hancock makes an enemy, as all superheroes must, but Eddie Marsan as Red is no Lex Luthor. It's a sad performance and in a not much developed role.

Basically, Hancock amounts to only mild amusement and gobs of eye candy. These days, eye candy will only get one so far. With a better script, a more thoughtful plot and a worthy adversary, Hancock might have been a truly entertaining cinematic experience. As it is, the movie is seriously disappointing. If you still plan to see Smith's latest feature, I recommend the theater setting over rental. What there is of this movie to enjoy, will fall to pieces once it's off the big screen.

Oh, and if you do pony up the cash for a movie ticket to Hancock, make sure you sit through the credits for a bit.

Overall Rating: 3 stars
Hottie Rating: 2 stars (no rippling abs in this one)

Alternate Recommendation: Unbreakable
Official Site
IMDB Page
SF Gate review

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Thursday, July 03, 2008

Wanted (2008)

Why does a textile factory have a meat locker????

Directed by: Timur Bekmambetov
Format: Theater
Starring: Angelina Jolie, James McAvoy, Morgan Freeman, Thomas Kretschmann

Movies involving hit men, secret societies and slo-mo gun shots aren't scarce these days, nor have they been for quite some time. So, why do they keep showing up in theaters? Well, the reason is obvious - they make money. People world-wide love to see a good shoot-out. But, the spaghetti westerns of old have given way to more high-tech weaponry and flashy special effects. I think the art of the gunfight was renewed here in the United States, when John Woo was discovered. His films in Hong Kong, like Hard Boiled and The Killer, made battling with guns beautiful. Seeing Chow Yun Fat and Danny Lee face off was like well-choreographed Kung-Fu. Sadly, much of Woo's magic was lost upon arriving on American shores. Then in 1999, The Matrix showed us that, if you can slow down bullets you can be a superstar. Watching Wanted reminded me a lot of the Wachowski brothers' successful debut.

Wesley Gibson (McAvoy) is a typical cube-farm drone with no backbone to speak of. His girlfriend's cheating on him, his boss is a royal bitch and his bank account is overdrawn. However, this sniveling anxiety-ridden excuse for a man soon discovers that he's meant for greater things. While filling his prescription at the local pharmacy, Wesley suddenly becomes the target of a mysterious gunman. As it so happens, he's the son of a magnificent assassin - one that just recently met a grim fate. Now the killer is after the young Gibson. Luckily for him, a member of a secret society of talented killers, Fox (Jolie), comes to his rescue. When ringleader Sloan (Freeman) and Fox reveal to Wesley his inheritance - mad gun fighting skills and a sizable chunk of money - he tells his boss to piss off and goes into training to become a badass.

Wanted borrows many plot devices from other films, but it doesn't feel like a rip-off. As in classic 70's-style martial arts films, the young star finds himself facing a fierce enemy and is defeated. So, the character spends the rest of the movie in training for a rematch. Wesley Gibson is a pathetic mess at first, but then finds a series of "masters" from which he can gain expert training so that he can hunt down his father's killer. Another oft-repeated element in recent films has been that of the disgruntled office worker shrugging off the shackles of modern society. Wanted has that feature too, somewhat reminiscent of an angry Edward Norton in Fight Club (but not quite as cool). Slow motion camera work and creative fight scenes are highly suggestive of The Matrix trilogy, complete with a sexy senior partner to guide the main character along.

So what is it, despite all the commonalities, that separates Wanted from so many other action genre fodder? Part of what makes this movie stand apart is the cast and director. Angelina Jolie, for me, is a gamble when it comes to performance. In films like Mr. & Mrs. Smith and The Good Shepherd, I found her a bit annoying and lacking any special spark. She performs terrifically, however, in this movie. She's sexy and mysterious, but very dedicated (not to mention her bitchin' tattoos). (I nearly wrote "not just eye candy", but everything in this movie is eye candy) Morgan Freeman is generally a safe bet as a seasoned actor, but is very similar to his character in Lucky Number Slevin. Would you have recognized James McAvoy from his role as the fawn in Narnia? I think not. He manages to make the transformation from wormy loser to steamy assassin in Wanted without much trouble. I always have a tendency to respect an actor more if he's shown a bit of range. Even the side characters, like The Butcher (Dato Khabensky) and The Repairman (Marc Warren) are fun to watch. My favorite of them was probably The Exterminator, played by Konstantin Khabensky. Khabensky has worked with Russian director Bekmambetov before as his supernatural anti-hero in Night Watch and Day Watch. As a fan of those films, it was a treat to see the actor have a small part in Wanted.

Bekmambetov was a good choice to helm this film. There's something fresh in his work that may lie in his use of light and colors. He's also got skills when it comes to using the slo-mo effect without over saturating. I'm sometimes reluctant to see successful directors in other countries make a movie in the U.S. Rarely do the producers here allow them to really be themselves without white-washing the film for our domestic audiences. However, Wanted, though not as dark and moody as Night Watch, still has plenty of the director's flavor intact.

Wanted was not a disappointment. Some of what you may have seen in the trailers does not actually show up in the final cut of this film, but that doesn't make it less of a cool flick. There aren't any lulls long enough in this movie to detract from the pulsating action. The dialog could have used a bit of a pick-me-up, but that's hardly more than a minor note in an otherwise fun time. I'd check out Wanted while it's still in theaters, as it's liable to lose some of its impact on a small screen.

Overall Rating: 3 1/2 stars
Hottie Rating: 4 stars

Alternate Recommendation: La Femme Nikita
Official Site
IMDB Page
Movie Cynics review

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